I admit, I'm late to the party. I've been watching Cobra Kai these last few weeks. I ran into an episode about "balance." And I've been chewing on it for weeks now.
I talk a lot about work/life balance; balancing our time we spend on work versus time spent on life. I also talk about the attention we give to work versus life; hanging out with the family while thinking about work...isn't actually "life balance." You're short-changing yourself and if that doesn't bother you...you're short-changing your family/friends/loved ones. And if that doesn't bother you? You have much deeper issues than can be addressed in a blog post.
The balance I want to talk about today though is about an inner-balance. Harmony. The work we do, the culture we're engaged in and the people we work with have to exist in harmony with who we are in order to create another, and perhaps more important, level of "balance."
My wife is a care-giver. It's who she is at her core. She found herself in the healthcare space as a pharmacist. Every day, she takes care of people. Like most people, there are aspects of her job that she isn't a fan of...however, engaging in work that is in harmony with who she is, gives her energy. What she does is in harmony with who she is. It's not a passion, it's a purpose and part of who she is.
When we're out of harmony in our career or with the culture we're engaged in...that energy depletion has to be restored from somewhere. Take a look at the image below:
The energy we get from pursuing things we enjoy, activities that are in harmony with who we are...gives us energy. It lifts us up. Those activities we engage in that are out of harmony with who we are, drag us down. In order to "balance the scales" the energy has to come from the things we enjoy in order to bring that side of the scale up to balance. We're robbing our joy in support of activities that aren't in harmony with who we are.
We rob energy from our family. From our hobbies. From our free time. All to support the drain of energy a bad environment, a bad job, a bad culture, a bad boss creates.
Which means we gain less and less energy from the things we enjoy the longer we're in work situations that are out of harmony with who we are. Over time, the highs are lower and the lows are lower.
This isn't about "pursuing our passion;" that's a fools pursuit. We'd all love to travel the world and write for a wine magazine. It is, however, about finding environments that support who we are. If we are creative souls, a desk job where we're reviewing reports all day will slowly rob our joy. If we are structured individuals, a chaotic start-up environment will drain
you every day.
As we roll into a new year, the most important task in front of us is to know ones self. We are no good in a role that isn't in harmony with who we are. Acknowledging that is not not admitting defeat. That's not failure. That's recognition that we could be better serving and better served elsewhere.
Knowing who we are and what work, environment, culture and people are in harmony with who we are will help us pursue the types of jobs and companies we should work in. And if you find yourself constantly drained...robbing energy from the activities you used to love in order to get yourself into the office on Monday? It's time. It's past time. But understand that the first battle is knowing yourself. The next battle is knowing the culture and environment that will be in harmony with who you are.
You may not get it right out of the gate...but keep looking. You, and your joy, are worth it.
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