Anyone familiar with the phrase “do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life?”
I hear it pitched around Linked In like it’s some sort of sacred text.
And I completely disagree with it.
There’s not much in life that is worth doing…that doesn’t come along with some sort of struggle. With work and effort.
As a parent, I can think of nothing else on the planet that I love more than my son. But some days…parenting is a struggle. Some days…parenting is work. The late night feedings, teething, being pooped on, puked on, pee’d on. The arguments and fights over the silliest of things. And moms…how was the whole “growing a human” thing? Struggle free? Of course not.
I think about sports I love playing…I’ve busted ankles, torn obliques, near-constant shoulder pain during the season and live with two screws in my finger from volleyball. It’s a lot of work to come back from those injuries…even though I love the sport. It’s work.
While this quote’s intentions are likely coming from a good place, it’s a destructive philosophy. It seeks to reap all of the reward without the struggle. It seeks to devalue the struggle…when in fact…the struggle is where all the learning & growth happens.
It leads people down multiple wrong ways to try and find the thing that “they love” because every job they pursue…has its’ struggles. Has “work.” Therefore…it must not be what they ‘love.’
I’m not suggesting that you suffer just to suffer. I’m not saying to stay in toxic work environments or environments where you aren’t growing. And I also flat out reject the idiotic tripe of "no one wants to work anymore."
But no matter how much you love something…no matter how much you love your work…there are going to be struggles. Bad days. It will feel like pushing water uphill.
I want to share a story I heard long ago about a butterfly’s transformation. A young boy found a cocoon and noticed it was wiggling around. The butterfly was struggling to free itself from the cocoon. So, the young boy began to pry the cocoon open. He wanted to help the butterfly; he wanted to ease the struggle.
When the butterfly emerged…it couldn’t fly. It couldn’t use its’ wings.
You see, when the butterfly is breaking from its’ cocoon, the struggle strengthens its’ wings. The struggle enables the butterfly to become a butterfly.
The struggles you go through in life and at work will empower you to become what you were meant to be. But it is work. And it will feel like work. Chasing this flawed notion that there’s a magic job…just waiting for you…that you’ll love and never again feel the struggle of work?
Not only is it a lie…but it’s limiting your potential.
All things worth accomplishing come with struggle. Come with work. By embracing the struggle, by struggling well…you’ll teach yourself how to fly.
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