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Writer's pictureBrian W Arbuckle

Getting Out Of Your Own Way

Updated: Mar 18, 2019

Learning is a process. It requires grace and failure. And time.

Human learning theory: learn that 1+1=2 one day and be able to solve calculus problems the next day.

Human learning reality: struggle to understand 1+1=2, finally get it...go learn something else, eventually forget why 1+1=2; re-learn.


Learning isn't linear. It's full of peaks and valleys. One day, the clouds part and we fully "get" it and the next, we're questioning how we ever graduated preschool. From sports to education to business, this peak-and-valley cycle repeats itself. In sports, we often times refer to the valleys as a 'slump.'


I'm a thirty-year bowler and twenty-year volleyball player. I can't count the number of slumps I've had in each sport. Once you feel that slump starting, you begin forcing things. Changing things. Introducing too many variables and inevitably creating a worsening slump. Frustration settles in. Your emotions are always flared. And the slump grows.


We start getting in our own way. A slump becomes a slump because of us. It stays a slump because of us. It's a self-feeding cycle. When we're learning something new, most of us accept that learning isn't linear; it's the re-learning or the 'slump' that catches us unprepared.


Business is no different. Actions that have helped us succeed for years may suddenly no longer produce the expected result. So, we start changing. But we change everything all at once. We get frustrated. And the results diminish even more.


When we hit these slumps, there tends to be one of three directions: 1. We bury our heads in the sand, pretend everything is fine and hope that it gets better 2. We try to 'muscle' through it; force the issue. 3. And, finally, there are those that just give up.


This season in my bowling league, I'm definitely in a 'slump.' My default is 'muscling' through the problem. I've changed too many variables, gotten frustrated and things have only declined. What I should be doing is changing one thing at a time to understand how that impacts my game.


Learning (especially re-learning) is more science experiment than an exact science. We have to establish a hypothesis. Test it, but only test one variable! Evaluate the results and repeat if needed. Here's another great tactic: talk through the problem with others to make sure there aren't variables that you haven't thought of. The simple act of talking through the problem with someone may show you a gap you missed.


Here's what doesn't work: Getting overly frustrated. Being angry that it doesn't work like it used to. Or ignoring the problem completely. Get out of your own damn way and tackle the problem in front of you. Then solve the next. One variable at a time. Eventually, you'll problem-solve your way out of the slump and learn a few things along the way.

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