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Writer's pictureBrian W Arbuckle

The Meaning Of Life

We spend so much time trying to decide what the meaning of life is...that we fail to live it.

I want to use the tragic news about Kate Spade as a springboard. I don't want to make assumptions about the demons she was fighting, but rather, use her struggle as a way to help others think about their own.


When I heard the news, I was scrolling through Linked In and stumbled across a post from an entrepreneur. He was humble-bragging about the number of hours he was working; in fact, he had fallen asleep late at night while working. But he still woke up at six in the morning to work out for "several hours."


This is what the gurus, experts and the uber-rich are trying to sell us. That their success is a function of the insane number of hours they put in. Further, if we want the same success, we have to mimic this behavior. We have to work ourselves to near death to be happy.


What a load of bullshit.

Kate Spade, seemingly, "had it all." She built a business from the ground up. She sold for billions. She had the life most of us dream of. Why didn't she find happiness at the end of that hard-work-rainbow? Because here's the dirty secret about what lays at the end of that rainbow:


....whatever you take with you.


That's right. Whatever happiness you take with you is, is what you'll find. And whatever demons you take with you, those will be there at the end with you as well. This isn't about "settling." It's about contentment. Being content with where you are, what you have and who you are doesn't mean you can't keep improving yourself and your situation. It does, however, mean that you choose happiness with where you are. Today. With who you are. Now.


I once sat in an interview where the woman I was interviewing with admitted that her divorce was "probably" due to the number of hours she worked. I asked if she had learned from that and she replied with a laugh "well, I probably work more hours now than I did then." She was surprised when I withdrew my name from consideration.


We are entering into an era of machines and AI. These computers can work 24x7x365. They won't need breaks. We, as humans, cannot "out-hours" these machines. If that's the only value you bring to the table, you'll soon be obsolete. The answer to today's complex problems isn't more hours, it's creativity. And you can't be creative when you need a fourth cup of coffee just to stay awake.


Most entrepreneurs start their business because they want to "change THE world." I don't. Don't get me wrong, I want to change worlds, but not THE world. As a father, husband, son, brother, friend...etc...the small things I do day-in-and-day-out change those peoples' world around me. Helping lay the foundation for my son to one day be a man...changes his world. I enjoy building businesses. It's challenging. Thrilling. Exasperating. And I can impact other peoples' worlds, but I don't have to do so by sacrificing my own.


All of this leads me to the meaning of life:

To live it.

I don't know the demons Ms. Spade fought and my heart breaks for those she left behind. Instead of brushing her passing off, take a moment to think about your life, those you would leave behind and the impact that would have. If you were to pass tomorrow, your company would have your job requisition up the next day. Your family, friends and loved ones? They will spend the rest of their lives missing you. Proceed accordingly.

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