There is only life-time. Do you really want to spend it while being treated badly?
I've been reading (and thinking) a lot about work/life balance; or work/life integration...or whatever the concept-du-jour happens to be. And then I ran into a quote (forgive me, I'm going to paraphrase it and I can't remember who said it): "there is no work-time or family time...there's only life-time."
It really hit home. When we're born, the clock starts ticking. The universe doesn't care if we spend an hour at work...an hour eating...or an hour watching TV. We're spending an hour of our life doing that activity. There are no refunds, no time-credits given for working. An hour spent is an hour gone.
Morbid? Perhaps. But it also brings an enormous amount of clarity. Too often, we accept a bad situation because of fear. A bad boss, a bad work culture, work we don't like doing, we accept it because we're afraid of change. But by accepting that bad situation day-in-and-day-out you're exchanging your life time for a paycheck and a situation you can't stand. No matter how much "balance" you achieve, those hours spent in a bad situation are simply gone. When we view that exchange in this new light, we have motivation to change!
First Things First
Whenever I get together with someone to talk about bad jobs or bad bosses, I always ask: "so, what do you want to do?" And inevitably the answer is "I don't know, just something different." So, I say "well, the fast food restaurant down the street is hiring, you good with that?" The person laughs and the answer is no. But that fast-food job is different, right? In order to find the job that you really want, you have to start asking yourself some tough questions.
The old days of blindly firing off resumes to any and every job listing is going to land you in the same situation you're in today. Stuck in a job you don't like and not sure how to find something better.
I lead people down a path of questions and I start with a wide net first: "Do you want to work remotely? Or in an office?" This one question alone can dramatically reduce the number of companies you're going to target. "Are you interested in moving or staying in town?" Again, we've dramatically reduced the number of companies.
Next: How long of a commute do you want? What industries interest you? What motivates you?
As the net tightens we start talking about what makes that person tick. Finding the right job is more than finding the highest paycheck...it's finding a culture and a mission that makes spending an hour of your life easier to accept. And in fact? If you keep searching, keep defining and keep narrowing in on the right job? Spending your hour of life time on the job will feel like time well spent.
The one fear you will have to face and overcome with this process of elimination approach is FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out). There will be companies and jobs that hit your radar that don't fit into what you've defined. You need to ask yourself what is it about that particular job that's causing you to go against your criteria, because maybe you missed something. This process is ever-evolving, just like you are.
So, to get started? Write down the easy, wide questions and answers. Then, start asking yourself the hard questions.
It's Hard But Worth It
As you begin to narrow down what it is you want, you also begin to eliminate companies. Which also shortens the pool of jobs you can apply for. And you'll start facing your FOMO.
Think about football players. How many football players are there on high school teams throughout the country? How many of them dream of playing in college and how many actually end up playing in college? Same question about the NFL and the Super Bowl. A very small number of football players ever play professionally. Even fewer ever win a Super Bowl.
But ask any former player if the pursuit was worth it, even if they never played for a Super Bowl and most of them answer with a definitive "yes!"
As players progress from high school ball to college to professional, there's an enormous amount of growth and learning that happens. Even if they don't make it to the next level, they are better than they were just a few years ago.
The same will be true for you. If you go through the process of trying to define what it is you want out of a career, you're going to be wrong. You're going to select wrong fits...but you're going to be better off for trying. You'll be closer than those that were afraid to try. And you'll have learned a great deal about yourself!
Don't Let Them Define You
I've been in a role before where I let my boss impact my self-esteem. I started believing that there wasn't a better role out there for me; that I was "lucky" to have the job I did and I should just put up with the bad behavior because I didn't deserve better.
Just because someone is giving you a paycheck does not mean they determine your self-worth. No job, no career, no boss, no paycheck...is worth you diminishing your self-worth. Remember it's your life time that you're spending.
You won't always get a paycheck that reflects your actual worth, in fact, you rarely (if ever) will. Which is why finding work that speaks to you is so important! You can find bosses that support you and respect you. And you can find cultures that help you become the best version of yourself.
Work has become such a 'dirty' word because we've bought into the lie that it's a means to an end (a paycheck). Most of us have to work, but, what if instead of accepting "anything" that pays the bills, we find something that we can believe in? What if we find something that makes us better? What if we look for something that is both professionally and personally rewarding?
Yes. It will still be work, it will still have shitty days...but what if we get a paycheck and feel supported, have opportunities to grow and also contribute to something meaningful? Doesn't that sound like a far better way to spend an hour of our life time than continually searching for work/life balance?
ความคิดเห็น